Thursday, March 29, 2012

Living with Autsim: Schedules and Robots!!

Living with Autsim: Schedules and Robots!!: So I was talking to my therapist about making Alex a Calendar so he sees the days that he has school, and the days that he doesn't, so he do...

Schedules and Robots!!

So I was talking to my therapist about making Alex a Calendar so he sees the days that he has school, and the days that he doesn't, so he doesn't get confused. She asked if I wanted to go even further and make him a schedule of his whole day... and I thought about it... and I figured out that I don't want that. I know that some parents have down on the schedule when the kids brush their teeth when they can play.. and that to me is so insane... when do they have time to be kids??

Yes, they are special needs, but they understand, they comprehend what is going on, they even use their disability against you lol i mean Alex is extremely bright and very independent, why would I take that away and make him into a robot, control everything he does and everything that happens (which btw, you can't control the freaking universe, as parents of autistic kids we need to understand that there will be situations that you will not be able to control) so he doesn't have a meltdown?
 I can tell Alex to get dress that we are going out spontaneously and he would not have a problem, like at all, is the opposite he brings his shoes lol why because I know that there are situations that we can not control and if he gets use to it then there is no problem.

We sometimes make it harder for our selfs, my mom has a saying that routine makes the monk, whatever you get him use to, is whatever he is going to be familiar with and comfortable with. Why schedule him to death and not give him time to be a kid?? because it makes it easier on you?
 for kids that have a social disorder they usually crave being around other children and around people, at least Alex does, so taking him to the park unexpectedly is a treat to him not chaos cause its out of his schedule..you know... like a regular kid!

I know when my son needs time to adjust and to feel comfortable, I know when I need to back up, I am pretty good in foreseeing a meltdown and I try always to prevent it, with a soothing voice and constant reminder that i am here and that everything is alright. I try not to panic or get upset.. why? cause they feel everything you feel, you know when a blind person can hear better than anyone else, is because they develop their hearing more to make up for the lack of sight, well I strongly believe that my child has developed more his instincts because of his lack of communication, so he picks up from me and his environment.

I try to keep calm, if something doesn't go according to "plan" which in my world it never does lol, I keep my self under control so he doesn't feel out of control. Sometimes I think that parents do more harm than good sometimes and they over work themselves and they over think everything to death, they don't relax so by the time their child is 10, they have nervous issues, panic attacks and everything else. Its not worth it I think, if you go with the flow you will get more results and a happier child.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Living with Autsim: Living with Autsim: Group Friend!

Living with Autsim: Living with Autsim: Group Friend!: Living with Autsim: Group Friend! : In group they encourage parents to become friends so we can have a support system. Its great because we ...

One Simple Act of Kindness... plz watch!!

I saw this video on CM and I took  it LOL so please watch, it is a beautiful video and a beautiful story and I really hope and wish that my son finds someone like this one day...


Living with Autsim: Group Friend!

Living with Autsim: Group Friend!: In group they encourage parents to become friends so we can have a support system. Its great because we get to talk to people that really kn...

Group Friend!

In group they encourage parents to become friends so we can have a support system. Its great because we get to talk to people that really know what we go through, and that understand. Marianne is one of those women that is in group with me, and she read something that she wrote about her son, and I asked her why she didn't blog, and she said that she didn't know how. So am going to teach her how to do things because I think she is a great writer and she totally understands her child and what Autism really is. I copy and pasted what she wrote about her son so you guys can read it as well.


His hands are flapping, his body rocking and spinning, his head is shaking/nodding repetitously-
 Noises come from afar-airplanes, police sirens, car alarms, loud music and so much more
His eyes are filled with sadness, scarce and uncertain expressions-all he wants is to be understood
People are pointing, kids are laughing and his voice is unheard-he just wants a friend...
Change all around him is surfacing, how can I stop his fears? Where is his mind going?
He may have words but still not clear-feeling confused but I keep him secure-
Why must they mock me for trying to keep him safe? Half the time-they do not even know his name
He is a child with so much ambition and ready to explore-everything he can to further his future
To not to understand his needs, his way of life, only hides your insecrutites or understandings.
He may scream at times to get  his point across-throw down his toys or want his own routine-do not look at him as being inapropriate; just see him as a child who is trying to express who he is the only way he can at hand.
Too many times others, stare and make judgements on children and how he or she is raised-but do not take enough time to understand those children with different needs feelings-they just pass them by. Not even thinking of anybody but themselves at the time-there are those who do reach out and  want to lend a hand, but sadly it is a small number of them. When we take time out to just say "hi how are you"? those words to one person can speak volumes if you are also willing to hear their stories too. Be a willing heart, be understanding to those parents struggling in difficult challenges, be open minded to those around you-only takes a minute to say "hello".


Monday, March 5, 2012

Living with Autsim: Parent Group Session

Living with Autsim: Parent Group Session: Today was the first parent group session for parents of Autistic kids. And it was great. It felt soooo good to talk to women that totally un...

Parent Group Session

Today was the first parent group session for parents of Autistic kids. And it was great. It felt soooo good to talk to women that totally understood what you were going through, and that honestly have a good sense of humor about it.
We talked about sensory issues with each of our kids, of dentists who treat autistic children (which I got a name and an address, i am going to look it up because the school will ask for it this year).
We talked about how we are treated in public with our kids, how people have no idea what we go through when we are in a public place and our kid is having a meltdown because its too loud, or the lighting is wrong, or they want something that they can't have. And we get the looks "your a bad parent" look that is really annoying. I pick it from my son, if he doesn't care, am not going to care why or when other people look at him... i have no shame LOL

Its incredibly comforting that I am not alone. That there are people that are going through the same thing and sometimes they are worse than you are. Its great to express all the headaches and the joys of your child, even tho they are not the same cases or one is more advance than the other. I love this group sessions because you get to learn what other parents are doing that I might want to try, or give your opinion on what is going on with their kids, without "you have no idea what your talking about" stare. Plus, i can not imagine talking about sensory issues to a parent of a regular kid, cause the truth is, unless you research and learn about it, or you live it like many of us do, you have NO IDEA.